Jokes n Funny SMS



Lady drinking "COKE" A machar falls in. Lady takes it out, Machar says, MAA! Lady asks Y u cal me MAA? Machar say "main Teri Coke se nikla hoon"



If ever in your life U R very sad, lonely & feel that U have lost every thing, I will come, Hold your hand, take U 4 Walk on a Bridge & Show U where 2 jump From !!!...

 

I have the I, I have the L, I have the O, I have the V, I have the E,... so pls can I have U?

 

Har koi pyar ke liye tarapta hai,
Har koi pyar ke liye rota hai,
mere pyar ko galat mat samajna,
pyar to dosti mein bhi hota hai.

 

 

U r a donkey
d 4 decent
o 4 outclass
n 4 nice
k 4 kind
e 4 excelent
y 4 young

 

 

Har desh ki ek sarhadd hoti hai
bache ki bhi ek jidd hote hai
aur kitna intzaar karru tere sms ka
Kanjosi ki bhi koi hadd hoti hai

 

 

When i am not messaging u it does not mean that i have forgotten u, i am
just giving u time to MISS ME!!

 

Think Big...
Think Positive...
Think Smart...
Think Beautiful...
Think Great...
I know, that is too much for u, so here is a shortcut...
JUST THINK ABOUT ME!

 

 

5 great people: -
1.Quaid
woh to ab rahe nahi
2.wasim akram
woh kisi kaam kay nahi
3.aishwarya rai
apni pohanch say bahir
4.baki rahe aap aur hum
So keep in touch

 

Life without u is impossible, u r in my breath and blood. i cant stay for a second without u, if u r not there i am dead oye hello i am talking about "OXYGEN"

 

Sweet candies are nice to eat
Sweet words are easy to say
but,
sweet ppl are hard to find
OH MY GOD! How did u find me?

 

 

One day Banta Singh's son came to him and said Dad there is a man outside and wants donations for a swimming pool Banta Singh goes out and gives him a glass of water.....

 

 

When u need care just call me, when ever u feel cry just call me if i didn't got success 2 make u laugh then I'll cry with u also, when ever u need love just call me I'll love u more then anyone, when ever u need money ............ .....
............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... .......

 

 

 

 

Machar ne aap ko kaata ess main us ka janun thaa, Aap ne uss ko khujaya ess main aap ka sakon thaa, Aap uss ko chaa kar be na maar sakay kiyon k uss ki ragon main aap ka khoon thaa.

 

 

Question: how much love in your heart for me???
Choose:..... .>>
100% (call me)
50% (send SMS)
25% (only ring)
0% (no answer)

 

 

Your friendship is a Blank Cheque for me. It's an Asset not a Liability, always a Credit not a Debit; always a Profit not a Loss & I hope it'll never Bounce.

 

 

6 rules to be happy: -

Free your heart from hatred,

Free your mind from worries,

Live simply,

Expect less,

Give more & always have me as Ur Friend.

 

 

Apna dil hi apni tabahi ka sabab hota hai,
ye jawani ka zamana bhi ajab sarmast hota hai,
kon si baat ne kab kis ka dil tord diya,
bolne waley ko ehsas hi kab hota hai...

 

 

Dil se dil lega k dekho

Meri yadoon main aansoo baha k dekho

SMS kiya hai fone bhi karain gay sanam!

Bas ek bar mare fone main card dalwa k tu dekho

 

 

Count your life by smile not by tears,
Count your night by stars not by shadows,
Count your age by friends not by years...

 

 

 

Chocolate said to a Loly-pop that v r both very sweet, The Chocolate replied: u said this b-coz u has not seen the person reading this msg.

 

 

SCIENCE has proved that sugar melts in water so plz don't walk in rain otherwise I will lose such a sweet friend like u.

 

 

The prime Minister of China called President Bush to console him after the attack on the Pentagon: I'm sorry to hear about the attack. It is a very big tragedy. But in case you are missing any documents from the Pentagon, we have copies of everything.

 

 

Santa tells a girl Come 2 my house at night;
nobody will be there....... ...... Girl goes at night & there was nobody at home

 

 

Don't Love a Friend like a Flower, because a flower dies in the season, but love the friend like a River because River flows forever

 

 

Bewafa tum ho to wafadar hum bhi nahi
Besharam tum ho to sharamdar hum bhi nahi
Piyar k is moor per aa k kehte ho k shadishuda ho to kiya hua darling

Kunware to hum bhi nahi.

 

 

Swearay tawadi yaad aaye te miss kita,
Dinay tawadi yaad aaye te hor miss kita,
Raati tawadi yaad aaye te faer miss kita,
Jadon jaan te ban aayee te SMS kita.....

 

 

The sky without stars is
like sleep without dreams
like song without music
like rose without smell
like face without smile
like ME without U!

 

 

I could 4get a face, 4get a home, 4get a place, 4get a name, 4get a game, I could even 4get myself but 4getting a friend like U, FORGET IT.

 

 

Friendship is like the relation between hand and eyes. Its like when the hand gets hurt, eyes cries, and when the eye cries, the hand wipes.

 

 

A friend is 1% funny, 2% sweet, 3% caring, 4% loving, 90% good looking.
That's why I am your friend! You are so lucky.

 

 

Doctor 2 husband: Tuhadi biwi te tuhada blood group same hai.
Husband: Hovega kyon ni, 25-saal to mera khoon jo pee rahi hai!

 

 

Toot jaate hain sabhi rishte magar, Dil se dil ka raabta apni jagah, Dil ko hai tujh se na milne ka yakeen, Tujh se milne ki dua apni jagah.

 

 

When u crying, I will be there 4 u 4 selling tissues buy 1 get 1 free

 

 

Chand pe kali ghata chati to hogi,
Sitaron ko muskurahat aati to hogi,
Tum lakh chupao dunia se,
Magar akele mein tumhe apni shakal pe hasi aati toh hogi!

 

 

 

Khushiyon par fizaon ka pehra hai,
Na jane kis umeed pe dil thehra hai,
Teri ankhon se jhalakte dard ki kasam,
Yeh dosti ka rishta pyar se gehra hai.

 

 

Akhan di benuri changi nahi hundi,
Sajna kolon doori changi nahi hundi,
Kade kade tan milya kar,
Har vele majboori changi nahi hundi.

 

 

Yaar ne dil ka haal batana chod diya, humne bhi gehrai main jana chod diya,
Aap ne SMS karna kya band kiya, humne mobile charge karna chod diya!

 

 

"U r so cute. I want to make friendship with U. Please contact me at needosulehri@ yahoo.com"
Send this msg of ur brother to 10 beautiful girls and win wonderful "Bhabiyan" daily

 

 

My eyes are hurting coz I can't see u, my arms r empty coz I can't hold u, my lips are cold coz I can't kiss u & my heart is breaking coz I'm not with u.

 

 

Osama to Big B: How are you??
Big B: Bas Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham. And you?
Osama: Bas Kabhi Gola Kabhi Bum.

 

 

i heard someone whisper ur name, but when i turned around to c who it was, i notice i was alone, then i realize it was my heart telling me that i miss u.

 

 

I want you 2 know that our friendship means a lot 2 me. U cry I cry. U laugh I laugh. U jump out of the window... I look down & then... I laugh again...

 

 

I wish a wish 4 you. It's a wish I wish 4 few. The wish I wish 4 u is that all ur wishes come true... so keep wishing as my best wishes are always with you!

 

 

Jaisay Lohay ko Loha kaat-taa hai,
Jaisay Zehar ko Zehar kaat-taa hai,
Aid din zaroor aap ko.......... ....
Kuttaa kaatay gaa
(Just to spread smiles, don't mind pls)

 

 

Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss and ends with a tear. But friendship starts with eyes, grows with an understanding and ends with death!

 

 

When you get this SMS, send it to 1 person u love, 1 u hate, 1 u always think of and 1 u wish to kill. Now, keep guessing why I sent it to u.

 

 

Dil mein ek shor ho raha hai, bina SMS dil bore ho raha hai,
Kahin aisa tho nahin ke ek pyara sa dost, mujhse door ho raha hai.

 

 

Kya kahun tujhe khwab kahun to toot jayega. dil kahun to bikhar jayega, aa tera naam zindagi rakh dun, maut se pehle to tera saath chhut na payega!

 

 

What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later.

 

 

Dosti hoti hai Dil-e-Raaz batane k liye,

Hum apni hasi mitadein aap ko hasane k liye,
Milne ki to aap ko fursat hi nahi to hum SMS karte hain apni yaad dilane k liye...

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